Ungrateful Bastard that I am…Hepatitis C

You Bastard, you killed Kenny

Hepatitis C treatment ended five weeks ago.  All is going well (~ nothing is wrong).  Went to Costa Rica with grand kids, hiked (slowly) up mountain sides.  Thank you Symbicort and red blood cells.  Now home.  I want to lay in guest bedroom (my sick room), watch recorded TV shows and eat sugar.  What’s up with that?  Fighting some mental and physical depression.  Back up.  Not necessarily so…anytime things are caddy wampass I frighten myself with the depression (DEBression) stick.  Kinda like a boogie man under the bed.

Ungrateful bastard that I am, I want to just “be okay”.  WTF does that mean?  Everyone who is “okay” raise your something.  Last time I re-uped for life post-treatment, I slowly weeded the front garden to demonstrate focus and progress to myself.  It took a week.  Currently it is 108 F heat index…so the hell with that.  I go to bed and get up the same time everyday.  Learning how to fall asleep naturally.  Not true…trying to learn how to fall asleep.  I’ve always had some distressing insomnia.  Maybe that contributed to my drinking a quarter century ago.  Maybe not. Currently I’m on two non sedating antidepressants and one sedating, slowly weaning off.  I can hear AA people judging.  Ta hell with ’em. Note to self:   What other people think of me is of no consequence.

You’d think I’d be more sensitive to the term bastard.  I’m not.  One thing I’m clear about, being born out-of-wedlock is not my burden.  Not sure I knew that 30-40 years ago.  And views change.

“Now more than half of all births to American women under 30 are born out of wedlock, and the trend in marriage-less birth is becoming an accepted reality of American life.” Don’t you love marriage-less over out of wedlock?  I wonder which group with an axe to grind is funding this.

“According to an analysis of government data, conducted by the research group Child Trends and reported by The New York Times, the last 20 years have seen illegitimacy among white women in their 20s with some college — but not a full four-year degree — rise more quickly than in other groups.”  …gotta love the internet.

Ah, yet another chapter in “Me-Me-Me”  My favorite subject, I am afraid.  Better keep dancing with the psychiatrist a bit longer. 

http://www.mysymbicort.com/

“You bastard, you killed Kenny”http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=1A6f3jHTC-Y

http://articles.businessinsider.com/2012-02-21/home/31081751_1_illegitimacy-black-children-unmarried-women

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